Twilight Lexicon Discussion Forums

9

Westley: [as he is unsuccessfully fighting Fezzik] Look, are you just fiddling around with me or what?
Fezzik: I just want you to feel you're doing well. I hate for people to die embarrassed.

10/10

I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top.
An English Professor,

9

Inigo Montoya: I donna suppose you could speed things up?
Westley: If you're in such a hurry, you could lower a rope or a tree branch or find something useful to do.
Inigo Montoya: I could do that. I have some rope up here, but I do not think you would accept my help, since I am only waiting around to kill you.
Westley: That does put a damper on our relationship.

9.5/10

I wanna hang a map of the world in my house. Then I'm gonna put pins into all the locations that I've traveled to. But first, I'm gonna have to travel to the top two corners of the map so it won't fall down.
Mitch Hedberg

9

Miracle Max: He probably owes you money huh? I'll ask him.
Inigo Montoya: He's dead. He can't talk.
Miracle Max: Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead. Mostly dead is slightly alive. With all dead, well, with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.
Inigo Montoya: What's that?
Miracle Max: Go through his clothes and look for loose change.

10/10

After one look at this planet any visitor from outer space would say "I want to see the manager."
William S. Burroughs

10, I'd like to see the manager, too.

Buttercup: You're the Dread Pirate Roberts, admit it.
Westley: With pride. What can I do for you?
Buttercup: You can die slowly, cut into a thousand pieces.
Westley: Tsk, tsk. That's hardly complementary Highness. Why loose your venom on me?
Buttercup: You killed my love.
Westley: It's possible. I kill a lot of people.

8/10

I was coming home from kindergarten--well they told me it was kindergarten. I found out later I had been working in a factory for ten years. It's good for a kid to know how to make gloves.
Ellen DeGeneres

7, not Ellen's best.

[Buttercup kisses the senile King]
The King: What was that for?
Buttercup: Because you have always been so kind to me, and I won't be seeing you again since I'm killing myself once we reach the honeymoon suite.
The King: Won't that be nice. She kissed me.

8/10

At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the second glass. The refill contained the antidote.
Emo Phillips